By: Iy Upadhyay (Guest Blogger)
Mom wrote an Open Letter a few months ago and that got me thinking. There is so much I need to tell the aunties and uncles and grand aunties and uncles of the world that nothing short of an open letter will work. So here goes:
Dear Aunties/Uncles/Parents at large
It is so nice that you love your kids and you sort of like the neighbour’s kid as well but please stop comparing them. While most of them will grow up in a world where “Sharmaji ka beta” will always be better than them, it is too early for you to put that kind of pressure on us already.
Kids my age are being taught colours, alphabets, numbers, capitals of the world and what not just because some other kid seems to know it. I would much rather sing, dance and colour (outside the lines, mind you!) and so would my friends.
While it’s nice you would like daughters to grow up in a “liberal” world, just because a baby girl likes/wears pink or loves playing with dolls or her kitchen set, don’t label her as a “typical girl”. My dad cooks and I love to help him roll pizzas in kitchen. Do not associate these things with gender. I could kick your son’s ass in “non-girly” things as well.
It also means that when you’re buying gifts for kids stay away from buying pinks and barbies for girls and blues and guns/cars for boys. I would suggest you stick to gender neutral colours and toys or if you can’t wrap your mind around that- just get gift vouchers!
You may want to stop over-protecting us or as mum likes to say “baby-ing” us. We can eat the food you eat, use the crockery you use and even understand all conversations you make.
Mommies stop feeling proud (or guilty) when dads help around the house or change our diapers or baby-sit us if you’re at work. It is as much their job as it is yours. He is a parent as well and must share equal responsibility.
Lead by example. If you don’t eat your veggies, we won’t. If you don’t put your shoes back in the rack, we won’t and if you use your phones and i-pads excessively, we would too. Create no-tech physical and time zones and stick to them. Your kid will never demand screen time if you don’t do it yourself.
And lastly, this is for all grand aunties and uncles. Yes, times have changed. Yes, things were different when you were growing up and when your kids were growing up. You don’t still take a bath at the village well and brush your teeth with neem right? If you’ve changed with time why can’t you accept parenting and kids have too. Stop saying “hamare zamaane mein”.
Ridress sent mom and I co-ordinated outfits but mom being mom, she wanted hers to look different so she styled it with a floral shirt. But, you like my outfit better right?
Dress: c/o Ridress (Customize)
Shoes: Max India Fashion
Dress: c/o Ridress (Buy)
Shirt: Shoppers Stop
Bag: Flea market find
Boots: Forever 21
Sunglasses: Style Fiesta
Pics: Bhavya Didi